Romance gets shit on a lot. People call romance novels predictable, formulaic, poorly written, anti-feminist, and a genre that creates unrealistic expectations for women (i.e orgasms and/or respect). And these people almost never have even read a romance novel beyond Fifty Shades of Grey or maybe Outlander. In the romance community, we are so used to bad takes and critiques from people that don’t read, write, or love this genre. But I ask the question: where are the fat heroes and love interests in romance novels? This question is not just a question, but also a critique and, perhaps, a call to action. As I ask this, I want you to remember that I love romance novels. I have read hundreds, if not thousands of them. This call is coming from inside the house. Romance novels have a long history of fatphobia. Old school historical romances, in particular, are filled with heroines whose waists are so small the heroes can encircle them with just their hands. Contemporary romances feature near-constant diet culture, makeover stories, and praise of small bodies. Listen, I still love a lot of these books. There are some I can acknowledge the problems in and move on and others which cross a line for me. The same is true for other problematic elements in romance novels. But these books sent a clear cultural message about who deserved romance, and it was straight, thin, non-disabled, and mostly white characters. Diversity in romance characters and authors has been growing steadily. But, when it comes to representation of all kinds, the romance genre still has a long way to go. Fat romance heroines are still a relatively new phenomenon. Many consider Bet Me by Jennifer Crusie from 2004 an early example of a fat romance heroine. And that is less than 20 years ago. Furthermore, not all romance novels with fat heroines include positive representation. Still, there are so many more authors writing amazing fat heroines right now than ever before. And there is almost nothing I love more than seeing fat female characters fall in love. But, even as I love these stories, they follow a trend of fat heroines who are paired with thin, physically fit heroes. This matchup has become normalized and celebrated within the romance genre. It represents a huge step forward in terms of fat representation. However, a problematic double standard persists when it comes to the lack of fat male romance heroes. The fact that after some serious hunting I could only find seven books featuring fat male heroes is telling. The majority of these books are self-published or published by small, independent presses. Many of the male characters were former athletes or sports-adjacent (which seems to present a different bias that it’s only okay for characters to be fat if they are physically strong or exercise). And only two of the books, The Lady’s Champion and Troublesome Crush, feature stories where both love interests were fat. I don’t say any of this to call out these books or these authors. These books were great, and you should read them. I salute the authors writing these stories and hope there are more of them soon. However, romance publishing has a long way to go when it comes to representing fat men as romance heroes. There is a message of internalized fatphobia present when we think that fat women can serve as love interests, but not fat men. I understand seeing a fat woman with a physically fit, conventionally attractive man can be a hugely satisfying pairing. This feels especially true when we think about how the opposite is more present in film and television, where fat actors are more likely to be matched with thin actresses than vice versa. Women in Hollywood and throughout society have had the most restrictive beauty and body standards forced upon them. Seeing fat women as beautiful, sexy, and lovable is a radical act that does deserve celebration. But when fat women are only considered love interests when thin men desire them, that is not true fat acceptance or body positivity. This formula too often treats men as trophies to be won, instead of partners to be cherished. And sometimes it feels like there is a message that fat romance heroines are “not like other fats.” Would these women be seen as less attractive if they were being pursued by fat heroes instead? For a lot of readers still working through their own body image issues (I’ll include myself in this, even as I’m working on it), I’m afraid the answer is yes. I’m not blaming any individual authors on this issue. Especially not the authors who are pushing and fighting to make a space for fat women in romance novels…which we also still need more of. But I also want to read more romances with fat men as heroes. And short men. Disabled men. Men who are thin but not physically fit. I want all of it. And publishers, authors, and especially audiences are going to have to work together to make room for these stories on our bookshelves and in our hearts.
